Daily, there are many, many things that try to entice away our attentions. Some of those things are good, and some of those things can take our eyes off of more leading things at hand, but every day, the media, our jobs, our friends, the phone, our computers, etc. All vie for our constant visual and mental devotion. Unfortunately for married persons, any of these things can also take our eyes off of the most leading man in our lives, and cause them to feel less significant to us. As a result, the news reports are dismal and dark with regard to the success of marriages, but with proper attention, we can keep the light on in our marriages, keeping them thoughprovoking and fulfilling, no matter the distractions colse to us.
There is a couples' rehearsal that I have both participated in, and led, in many marriage workshops. It's a pretty straightforward rehearsal in concept, but very difficult to carry out. This rehearsal illustrates the problem of our attentions in a very tangible way. Grab a timer and your partner and try this one. Set the timer for one minute, and then without any talking at all, look into your marriage partner's eyes for one minute. No talking! Keep your concentration focused on your spouse for the full minute, but don't comment, don't chat, and try not to giggle. It's not as easy as it might seem.
The infer for this is that we have much shorter concentration spans than we would like to admit, and focusing on someone else man is just not easy. We'd rather think about ourselves. However, keeping our attentions on our spouse is admittedly one of the most leading marriage tools that we can use to find joy and fulfillment. When we "spotlight" our spouse and their interests, we are giving them one of the most high-priced gifts we can give - our time. Time is one of the only things that we can never replenish, so when we give it to someone else man that says something of their importance to us. In a marriage, your spouse wants to, and should be, the most significant attention-getter in your life.
Conceptually, we can all agree with this, but practical application is not easy. We must be willing to seek their opinions first. That means before we consult our friends or other house members. We must be willing to seek our spouse's welfare first. That means before we seek the welfare of our children, or our coworkers. We must be focused on shining the light on their talents and not our own. We must be curious in their passions, their challenges, their hobbies, their needs, their wants, their "time," and in all of the things that make them tick.
A funny thing happens to the one who holds the flashlight, and that principle applies here, too. The light, shining on our spouse, will illuminate their strengths and show off the best of who they are. That is good for us to see, and good for us to do for them. But the holder of the flashlight, if you will, has the opening to direct the light. By focusing on the character of our spouse that we want to highlight and emphasize, and by giving them our time and attention, we reinforce those things that drew us to them in the first place, manufacture that "light" brighter and encouraging them to stay "in the light" while illuminating the path for others with the radiant light. The flip side of this is also true. If we try to turn the flashlight on ourselves for any length of time, we find that not only do we establish a crick in our wrists due to the unnatural angle, but all colse to us becomes dark, unclear, and vague, and we are likely to stumble.
So, where are your attentions pointed in your marriage? To what you need and want, or to what your spouse needs and wants? Do others routinely get your attentions before your spouse does? These are not one-time questions. They need to be continually asked throughout the marriage to keep that beam of light shining out for others to advantage and grow from, not the least of which is your own spouse!
Greenlee 0153-02c Screwdriver Rust Resistant Chrome Plated Cushion Grip Slip Resistant Overview : Handle marked for easy identification of screwdriver size, type, and length.High-grade, rust resistant, chrome-plated finish.Soft, cushioned grip for extra comfort and torque.Exceeds ASME/ANSI specifications.
Greenlee 0153-02c Screwdriver Rust Resistant Chrome Plated Cushion Grip Slip Resistant Feature
|
*** Product Information and Prices Stored: Feb 04, 2012 13:16:11 You can check update price Here >>
Flashlight
My Links : lady shoes shop Ladies watches
No comments:
Post a Comment